Hello, 2011.

Here is my new post for the new year.

I'm an official graduate. Right now, this past month, and this next month up until February 22 at 3pm I'm supposed to be studying to take the GRE exam. I've never been good at studying.I lack the discipline to sit down and do it and the idea of doing it.. and even thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach. I really wish it wasn't over already, my undergraduate career. I miss school. I miss a routine. I haven't gotten a single response to the probably around 50 places I've applied. I need money. Life generally blows at the moment.

I have decided to abstain from sex this year. And honestly... I could get really sappy as far as my reasoning and if I were to explain it I would feel the need to keep it vague anyhow. The sad happiness is still filling me and I'm accepting the way things are. Contenting myself because I don't want anything less than what I have and I certainly don't want to ruin any possibility by trying to find what I don't think I could find anywhere else.If that makes any sense. Everything as it is makes me happy. Despite longing a little something more, I choose not to disturb what is settled.

I've been trying to walk for about an hour each day. I don't do this EVERY single day but I do it most of the time. I didn't a few times due to rain and not feeling well. I muddied up my shoes something fierce earlier today (technically yesterday) at Bear Creek.

I took Shelby and Sparky instead of Fabio. They dawdled and I ended up walking at a pretty slow pace as I expected. There are always creeps at the park. People who just drive around in circles. People who drive and park in one spot then drive and park at another spot. I turned onto a culdesac and parked... and then some stupid ass asian guy pulled into it and parked also. Dude was fucking serious. So I left and found someplace else. I was annoyed. Sparky barked at a tree branch across the creek that had plastic pieces streaming in the wind on it. They both led me to random piles of foreign animal shit that I had to drag them away from.

I ended up eating two helpings of pasta my dad made. I had to walk again so I took Fabio to the track at Leider. We did five laps and then walked a few blocks in the hood. Fab is such a good dog. I wanna take him out more. Take his ass camping and to the beach. I took him to Bear Creek Tuesday or Wednesday and we walked for like... 2 hours... it was exhausting. I had never been on the Bear Creek nature trails either.

I'm excited for summer. The weather has been pretty beautiful these passed few days. Not too hot and not too cold. Pretty fabulous. I can't wait to outdoor tan. Unfortunately it's Mexico on both sides of our house. Our neighbors to the left have garage sales every other weekend. It's hella annoying. I see the neighbors on the right pretty frequently whenever I'm driving around, walking around, or grocery shopping. If I didn't dislike them so much for no fucking reason other than living next door I might say hi to them and not be such a bitch. But...

I'm a bitch.

Thursday I went walking in Hermann Park at night. It was really nice. Felt awesome outside.

My aunt Farideh sent us a box full of pistachios and these fruit roll up things. Fucking delicious. I love it all. She sent it in December, I think. Before Xmas. It took forever to reach us.

I need to make it a goal to read more often.

I've been watching more movies. They make me happy. It's been a long time since I would sit down and watch a movie in its entirety. I'd like to do similar with books. Sit down and read, actually become interested, and finish the thing.

Money really does make the world go round. I want to get lost in space. I want to draw and paint. I want to lose weight. =]

Life is wild.