I sound so smart.

But I do some pretty dumb shit... But I take some things into account before I perform said actions.

I love my boyfriend. He really is wonderful... So much more wonderful than I probably deserve but I am grateful and feeling, I hate saying the word I'm about to say, blessed. He makes me happy without even really DOING anything and he relishes my joy. I'm kind of getting misty eyed with happy tears just mentioning it. There is most definitely happiness behind it... But I have to admit I'm guilty of being slightly afraid. Not of commitment but more or less because of the future. It might be a pain in the ass to introduce a black man to my family but NOT because of me... But because of them. Charles is amazing and EVERYONE WILL LIKE HIM. Because its too fucking easy to like him :)

He and I take terrible pictures together. We went and saw Ghostland Observatory perform on Thursday night and my camera sucks and he looked high in every picture. Ohwell.

Anyways... My dad had open heart surgery about 3 or 4 weeks ago. I make all of his meals or prepare them. He's very spoiled now and very used to it. I went clubbing last night and he called me around 1:30am as I was coming home.

"Where are you? Ehhh, You're supposed to be taking care of me!"

"I do take care of you. I'm coming home. What do you need right now at 2am?" *click*

And he hangs up on me!

Sigh. I don't know.

Morality

What is good? What is universally good?

Sex can be good. It is not universally understood as a good. It is a sometimes vigorous physical activity that can be healthy if precautions are taken. Orgasms feel good. They feel awesome.

Smoking weed is DELICIOUS. It's unhealthy though. Therefore it is not as good as sex. It is natural. Nature is good but not all things in nature are.

It's so contradictory to classify or analyze objects and subjects. Sometimes I think descriptions are all lies because they are all different... I despise honesty, but only when I'm being dishonest. Because if we were all honest we would all understand, that is, if things were more universally accepted and agreed upon.

All conflicts are results of politics. Policies are decisions based on opinions of a "majority" where boundaries of what is right and what is wrong are blurred, askew, temporarily overlooked. How can rules exist and be fairly enforced if there have to be exceptions? Exceptions... Circumstances... These lead to change but how can you define something that is changing... Without creating a new word, label, expression, or some bullshit.

What I do... Does not change who I am. What I do... Is what I am. What you know about what I do only alters your perception of me. If I am known and accepted, I am good.

Blah, blah, blah, blah.